There's a colossal difference between a woman being coerced into having a child by her partner, and a woman deciding along with that partner to have a child. In the case of Nikki Reed and Ian Somerhalder, it seems we have a classic misunderstanding between the two — at least, that's what Twilight star Reed is claiming.
During a recent interview on Dr. Berlin's Informed Pregnancy Podcast, Reed and The Vampire Diaries' Somerhalder joked that Somerhalder had eagerly thrown away his wife's birth control when they decided to start a family.
"It was the beginning of the pack, so I had to pop all those suckers out," Somerhalder laughed, recalling the 2016 Barcelona vacation during which they started trying. The two welcomed daughter Bodhi Soleil Reed Somerhalder in August.
Some fans, however, were concerned by the language used during the interview, which did echo common tactics of control and abuse used by men against women. The tale quickly became controversial, inspiring multiple written responses across the web. On Friday, an infuriated Reed addressed one of those responses, condemning its author for using a false narrative to stir up drama.
"Dear writer. Here’s my note to you on irresponsible journalism," she wrote alongside a screenshot of a typed note:
"Quote from an article this morning claiming my husband tried to 'force me into pregnancy?!' Oh and my favorite line 'That is some unconsented bullshit right there.'
"My response: Yep. When you actually listen to the podcast (which I'm sure you didn't) you'll hear how 'unforced' I felt. Ha! Also, 'unconsented' bullshit is you speaking on my behalf in a story admittedly taken out of context for the purpose of stirring up drama WITHOUT my approval.
"Don't talk about consent to me. And lastly, how dare you try to cast a dark shadow over one of the happiest most memorable days of my life – you're not only disrespecting me but my baby.
"Oh, and next time you try to stand up for women by writing an article 'about women’s rights,' try properly conveying the way I felt. It's a shame that this was your way in. You have a platform, write about things that matter by using truthful stories, not gossip. Thanks and goodbye. -Nikki"
Reed penned two additional tweets beforehand that also addressed the topic.
Emotional control and domestic abuse are serious problems that we should be discussing, but when we force a benign statement into the rumor mill, we're doing no justice to the issue — or the woman and child that gossip harms.
It's true that Somerhalder's choice of words (or actions) was imprudent, but Reed has made it 100 percent clear that she consented to starting a family and, in the end, consent is everything.