Fact: Taylor Swift
writes songs about her exes. Fiction: She has a "list of demands" for all of her boyfriends going forward. The latest wacky rumor is being reported by Hollywood Life
, which claims she's taking a "new approach" to her love life" and has since made a "long list" of criteria for the next guy she dates. It's an "intense" exercise on the road to finding the "perfect guy," according to the site's "source."
While it's all fine and good to have standards when dating — especially when you're a mega-rich superstar — this list sounds a bit bogus. Not to mention the fact that the guy who meets all of the criteria probably doesn't actually exist, although we hear there's possibly life on another planet
Anyway, just for fun, let's take a look at some of the most ridiculous demands for Swift's next romance:
- He has to be "leading man hot." Shia LaBeouf is a leading man, so is he in the running?
- He has to "speak at least two languages." Does Pig Latin count? That would be awesome.
- He has to have "at least one sister." Because "she thinks it will make him a better boyfriend." So now we're eliminating dudes for their parents' reproduction systems/choices?
- He can't be a mama's boy. But he has to have a "good relationship with his parents, especially his mom." Okay, we've entered Goldilocks territory with the mom issue. "My relationship with my mom is juuuuust right."
- He has to be "on her level" in his career. How about Mick Jagger?
Now we have excellent reasons why Swift's previous relationships never worked out: John Mayer
and Joe Jonas
don't have sisters, Jake Gyllenhaal
and Harry Styles
don't speak two languages (that the Internet knows of), Chord Overstreet
isn't quite leading man hot (sorry), Conor Kennedy
doesn't have a career (he's a student), and Taylor Lautner
is probably too
close to his mom, since he was still living with his parents
a few years ago.
Of course, Swift's rep had a field day with all of this "news" about the star. "This is absolutely false. Hilarious, but false," her rep told Gossip Cop
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